We’re living in scary times. The rich have never been richer, and our government has never been more corrupt. In fact, it isn’t even clear if our government is located in Washington, D.C. or Israel. And what are we going to do about climate change, accelerating extinctions, and those enormous swathes of garbage floating in the ocean? Oops . . . maybe we should worry about World War III first.

While some people wonder how we’re going to survive, others are obsessed with . . . flags?

That’s right; U.S. state flags, to be precise. A great Confederate symbols witch-hunt that has long been fanned by the corporate media has focused attention on a variety of symbols, including flags, that aren’t politically correct. Some are downright racist. At the same time, vexillologists—people who study flags—are irked by the fact that most state flags aren’t even competently designed. In fact, many are grotesquely ugly.

Not surprisingly, there have been efforts to upgrade state flags in a number of states, and those efforts may be slowly gaining steam. However, the enemy includes stubborn and often incompetent legislators and ordinary citizens who are loathe to part with the symbols they grew up with. Some view attempts to change “their” symbols as a personal attack.

The situation is amazingly complex and confusing. Should state flags be changed? If so, why? And who should lead the charge—vexillologists, legislators, or ordinary citizens? Should new flags be subject to a public vote?

I say, Hell yes, about three dozen state flags need to be put out to pasture. The “traditionalists” who just can’t bear to part with some amateurish rag their brain-dead ancestors “fought for” are welcome to display those outdated rags in their living rooms. Hell, they can fly them in their front yard, display vintage flag decals on their cars, and embroider the most fucked-up flags ever conceived on their clothing. In the meantime, the rest of us can and should move on to better things.